so v tired

so tired of living in this hectic country.
so tired of having this thought that i need to work.
so tired of having a burden that i need to consider.
so tired of having a job i hate doing.
so tired of growing up.
so tired so tired so tired. so tired of being so tired.

i never wanted to grow up. i want to be still the little girl, with no worries and nothing.
but i was forced to. and i really hate it so much.
being worried and so stressed up the past few days after saturday made my gastric worked up and im feeling so shitty. and now im having this phobia of my gastric working up every time i eat something.
double shitty cause i see food but i totally have no appetite to even eat. S.I.G.H

whats worst is that my mc is ending today and back to that shit place to slog AGAIN tmr. SIAN MAX.
but i thank god i had my awesomest boyf to bring me to the doctors and also to look after me.
never been more thankful for his presence. ily baby. you're the best :')

now, im stressing what is the next step i should take. i hate hate haaaaate making decisions. oh well, maybe im just a #libra. i cant make decision for nuts. haha! v indecisive.
and the weather now is a killer. sibeh hotttt. wtf im sitting infront of the fan and the wind is warm and thus making me warm and sticky and irritated. URGH. and my room feels like a furnace. #yaosiu.

oh yes, plus another 10 more days to my king's day. and im still like a lost sheep, without any direction nor any ideas what to do... OH GAWD, somebody save me? drop me some ideas....
6 years and totally running out of it. hahahaha! not boasting but i sincerely and really need some help.
THIS.IS.BAD. thou i have an idea up on mind already. but but but but... ok we shall see. teehee.

ytd i was talking to love on the phone after he booked in. and i was asking him wad should we do. hahaa and we started talking about the past 6 years of birthdays, valentines and anniversary gifts we had for each other. totally cannot remember sia, damn jialat, he made me refer to my blog, but i realise i dont post out what we had for each other leh........ le sigh!


ok out of topic already, no mood to blog anymore. till when im better, i be back. xoxo.